anti-theft lunch bags

9 Jul

I sometimes wish I had a normal 9-5 job, so I could have lunch breaks and better understand all the passive-aggressive letters in breakroom kitchens that I read on

But since I don’t, does anyone have a use for these? And if you have any awesome or terrible office tales, post them below! I absolutely love office politics.

Anti-Theft Lunch Bags:

17 Responses to “anti-theft lunch bags”

  1. Denise Miller July 9, 2011 at 8:15 pm #

    I am Jamaican and we make our food spicy so I lace my left over lunch meals with scotch bonnet pepper so if any of those nosy greedy Americans touch my food their ass will be burning!

    • Arabelle July 10, 2011 at 1:47 am #

      Never thought of that. I love it!

  2. Laura July 9, 2011 at 8:58 pm #

    There is a hilarious episode of Friends about this…Ross freaks out that someone eats his Thanksgiving leftovers sandwich…

    I’ve never really had drama with someone stealing my food at work, but I have gotten many a strange look/comment when I’m stuffing a sandwich in my face at 5pm in my office when I think no one’s looking. “Is that…lunch…or dinner…?” Awkwardly, it’s neither.

  3. Amber July 9, 2011 at 10:00 pm #

    I don’t have any interesting stories about food of mine, but I do work in an office and the cleaning people steal our lunches on occasion, and the other day, I noticed a piece of moldy meat in the back of the refridgerator in a plastic bag so I threw it away then got yelled at by my boss. It was a piece of freaking moldy meat! If someone was going to eat that, I have some questions for them.

  4. Tom July 9, 2011 at 10:00 pm #

    Here’s a great one from our lunchroom:
    We’ve got a scoundrelous lunchroom theif that has gone uncaptured for months, if you leave a Subway sandwich in the fridge, that shit is as good as eaten before your lunch break. Knowing this, someone bought one and “tainted” it before putting it in the fridge. After it disappeared they send out a company wide email declaring that they had a friend with a “communicable disease” spit in it, and the theif should get checked by a medical professional. The emailer was promptly fired, however, as they had sent it to the CEO and upper management as well.

  5. catvoncat July 9, 2011 at 10:27 pm #

    One time I ordered some Tex-Mex for lunch and was planning to take home the leftover chips and queso. I put the queso in the fridge and kept the bag of chips at my desk. A couple hours later, one of the file clerks came up to me and asked where the chips were. She said they were eating my queso in the break room and needed the chips. I was speechless, but of course, being too nonconfrontational to say anything, I just sighed and handed over the chips. To be fair, I do often share my leftovers by leaving them on the table in the break room, but I thought it would be obvious that if I sealed something up and put it in the fridge, I wasn’t trying to share it. Perhaps I should have specified that with a passive-aggressive note.

    • chrissyteigen July 9, 2011 at 10:31 pm #

      LOL i love that you just handed over the chips. I would totally do that too, then complain and be SO mad about it later.

  6. Sheelac July 9, 2011 at 11:39 pm #

    Not an office story (but I’m sure dwight has some good ones), but me and my college roomates would write “I have mono” on a full container of ice cream that we had put in the common area fridge. No one ever touched that shit again!

  7. Arabelle July 10, 2011 at 1:44 am #

    Hahaha those anti-theft bags are absolutely brilliant!

  8. Dean July 10, 2011 at 5:19 am #

    No lunchroom theft here, we are forced to label and date our food. You are responsible for removing anything that’s yours that you no longer require. Then random inspections of the fridge by the admin pool has serious repercussions for anyone wanting them to do anything for them ever again.

  9. Kandi July 10, 2011 at 10:26 am #

    So, the IT guys get super pissed if people other than IT use their refridgerator. But their fridge is 20 ft from my desk, and ours is a bit of a walk. Well one day I put a can of slim fast in their fridge. I came back at lunch, and my shit was gone, with a note: “Thanks for the Slim Fast” on the outside. Well, I know it was Denise the cat lady, cuz I can’t imagine guys drinking slim fast… So I waited till after she left and took EVERY ONE of her yogurts out, opened them and left them on her desk overnight!

  10. Melissa July 10, 2011 at 3:16 pm #

    Ahahaha! These stories just made my day. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it) I don’t have any of these whackos at my work. We’re all pretty boring and nobody would ever eat someone else’s food. One time I did put my water bottle in the freezer so the water could get really cold, then when I went to get it it was gone……but that’s about it.

  11. Yorgos Marinakis July 10, 2011 at 3:48 pm #

    Usually I do not have these problems, since I practice law out of my house. But once I volunteered for a not-for-profit, where I found a mini-refrigerator and put my lunch in it. Later I heard the receptionist (a retired attorney!) screaming “whose stuff is this in MY refrigerator!!!” Turns out it was her personal refrigerator. I almost didn’t tell her it was my lunch.

  12. kathy July 10, 2011 at 6:07 pm #

    Fucking office politics. We have a kettle and a coffee maker on our floor. There is one crazy woman who MUST have fresh water. Even though the water in the kettle might have been poured in ten minutes ago and is ohhh yah know…BOILED!! I was waiting for the kettle to click to let me know it’s ready to enjoy my morning tea. Crazy lady walks over unplugs the kettle and throws the near boiling water down the sink!! My mouth was agape in disbelief. She then filled it back up and boiled it. Umm.. hello i was there first bitch!! Some anonymous annoyed person has taken the liberty to tape a typed little label on the kettle saying “please refill kettle when finished”’s not that serious. It takes TWO SECONDS to fill it back up you still have to wait for it to boil and then you risk crazy lady dumping your shit out and preempting your boil.

    Don’t get me started about the mini fridges and the complaints regarding food storage.

  13. Chrissy too July 11, 2011 at 11:53 pm #

    I used to work in a retail store and someone stole my leftover delicious pasta from the fridge. I asked every single person (including the security guards and cleaning ladies – we had a small staff) if they had seen it. Nobody would confess, and it was a slow day in the store so I sat and reviewed the security footage of our break room. It ended up being the snotty girl I suspected from minute one and I totally called her out on it. She clearly didn’t realize I was invested enough in the pasta for these drastic measures, but it was from Raoul’s in Soho and bitch had it coming.

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