Stop the presses.

26 Jun

Holy moly, this looks delicious:

…and the name makes it sound even better: Spaghetti Con Proscuitto, Funghi e Asparagi…with cream.


But alas. I have a confession. For the past few weeks I have been a dirty sneak. I hate myself for it, but I have gone low-carb for the summer. Just saying it makes me cringe, but I’ve found it to be necessary with a rather large swimsuit shoot coming up in August. The first few days of the diet pretty much made me want to rip off the faces of those around me. Except this face…look at this thing! How could I ever rip that off? The only reason I would rip his face off is if he died and I had to get a new dog who I would pretend is still Puddy by making a mask.

I’ve heard stories about 7 year intervals in between distinct body changes. The first time I realized I was becoming womanly was around 18….and now I’ve found myself at 25, and the weight just ain’t sittin the sexy way it used to. Although I personally am happier with some love curves, the business I’m in isn’t usually too ecstatic about it so for now, I try to meet them in the middle. And it sucks.

Anyhoo. Make this for me. And don’t eat it seductively. Eat it like a rabid monster, like it’s your last meal and some bitch is gonna rip it from your hands. “My cold, dead hands.”, you say creepily.

Recipe here:

17 Responses to “Stop the presses.”

  1. julie demdam June 26, 2011 at 7:20 pm #

    seeing as you’re half thai – this is an appropriate inquiry. what’s your go to thai place in the city? hell’s kitchen? tribeca? this full asian wants to know. thank you and good day

  2. Kelly June 26, 2011 at 8:33 pm #

    Right? What is it about turning 25 that fucks with our bods so much. Not cool. Also, that is the cutest dog face ever.

  3. yasminlennie June 26, 2011 at 8:44 pm #

    If i make said yummy looking recipe do u want photos of me scoffing it down?

  4. Scott June 26, 2011 at 8:53 pm #

    Whoa, you can actually write…and I don’t mean that in a surprised way, only in a ‘I’m jealous’ kind of way.

  5. blondi0522 June 26, 2011 at 8:54 pm #

    I’m doing the low carb thing as well. As much as I love carbs, my body feels better without them. It will be well worth in when you land the 2012 cover for SI. Can’t wait and really hope you do!!!

  6. Heidi June 26, 2011 at 9:55 pm #

    Hi! This blog is cool, I’m going to follow it for sure! I saw this today on…if you haven’t seen this site yet, you should definitely check it out! I’m making chicken pesto meatballs from there tonight!

  7. Heddy J. June 26, 2011 at 11:02 pm #

    that dog looks like the old guy from Pawn Stars. what a mush.

  8. lizzrod June 27, 2011 at 4:08 am #

    Chrissy blog means I can leave Facebook and never be bored again. Thanks my dear.
    Tell us what you’re drinking with the meals too… Winos unite. 🙂

  9. Tuesdai June 27, 2011 at 4:34 am #

    A witty-comical model who cooks and I’m a handbag designer who hates to bake and only knows how to cook “everyday stereotype foods.”You know: rice, sloppy joes, spaghetti, fried/baked chicken, and eggs. We shall get along perfectly. *tired dry giggle-smurk*

    I’ll try to “learn something” (when I come to visit) as the old folks always encourage us youngens to do, and when I get lazy I’ll just skip back to what mom always says, “I ain’t gon be with you always…” ….I don’t believe her, Ha. That recipe looks good! Thanks for sharing and for

    P.S. Don’t feel ugh, by the time you’re 29, you’ll have “ugh’s”that’ll be more laughable than the ones you had at 25-years age…ask me how I know, hehe. At 29 I’m finally seeing “what my momma gave me” and desperately doing everything I can to slow my metabolism down. I probably won’t feel like that at 31, we’ll see….Ha. I won’t talk your ears off any longer. Following you on Twitter….and now good-bye.

  10. Becky C June 27, 2011 at 10:29 am #

    I too am on the old low carb summer “regime” . . . And find odd comfort in cooking/ baking up a storm in the kitchen for others also in looking at delicious food on blogs and YESSSSssss victory I can add sodelushious to that list! That looks so yum 🙂

    By the by your my favourite tweetie pie on twitter!

  11. catvoncat June 27, 2011 at 11:45 am #

    “Like a rabid monster” is pretty much how I eat everything. My fellow diners are usually ducking my food shrapnel throughout the meal. Because I am a lady. Who eats like a T-Rex. I don’t get asked out to dinner a lot.

  12. becs June 27, 2011 at 2:44 pm #

    So glad you’ve started this blog. I’ve been waiting 1.5 years for this since you said you were going to do a coffee book. Can’t get enough of you. Love your wit and love food.

    just a quick note…while a low-carb diet is so not fun, I have a suggestion for you to make your efforts most effective and efficient: BioSignature Modulation. This program has supplements that help with hormone imbalances to help you process food better and get rid of stored fat due to hormone imbalances. B/c they focus on hormone imbalance, the program can actually focus on specific parts of the body to lose fat. It’s big in the athletic world. My sister did it and lost 7% body fat in the right places in 2 months for about $400 worth of supplements per month. I’m a grad student, so i’m doing what i can afford at the moment on my own. here is some info:

    not that you need any help b/c you are stunning and absolutely gorgeous. but by helping your body process some of these “bad, but so good” foods through supplements, perhaps you will be able to eat more of what you love and still reach your goals.

    okay, i’ve written way more than i planned.

    • chrissyteigen June 27, 2011 at 9:44 pm #

      I am loving this info, seriously. Thank you! I think I’ll make my way to GNC tomorrow to inquire…nose held and all. That place reeks. : )

      • becs June 27, 2011 at 10:30 pm #

        oh good, i’m glad! my comment sounded so salesy, but i have nothing to sell and this stuff is legit. you share great info on food and we can help share great info on how to enjoy that food and still look good.

        you can def try to do it on your own like I am, but for best results, look up a person that is certified in the NY area to create a program for you. that monthly fee I talked about with my sis also included a weekly consultation with a person and a weekly body fat testing in each area to watch weekly progress. they compare where you store fat relative to each fat storage area in your body to then develop a personalized supplement program dependent on where your body needs a boost. and yes the supplements smell.

        There is a ton of info online if you search. and don’t get scared that it is geared towards athletes b/c it is such a personalized thing. Here’s another article I found helpful in my efforts to develop a program on my own that I cross checked with some of the stuff my sis did. It is a lot more science than most of us care to know, which is why a certified person creating a personal system would be my preference (but is still kind of fascinating in a nerdy way)

  13. becs June 27, 2011 at 10:41 pm #

    oh damn it, this is actually the article i meant to post. they are all pushing products, but they are also very educational and have more names of herbal supplements if you were to go to the GNC.

  14. Ronnie Mok June 28, 2011 at 4:47 pm #

    i’ve been trying to go low carb too! but everything has freaking carbs. i just found out that fruit has carbs. :-/ I have my Regina George moments when I ask “Is butter a carb?”

  15. Tall girl July 21, 2011 at 9:05 am #

    It’s not only when you turn 25. It’s gets gradually worse at 30 and 35 and hits an alltime low (or high, if you consider your weight gain issues) at 40. That’s how far I’ve got, but I’ll keep you posted of any further developments.

    Btw great blog yo’ver got! Stumbled across it today from Fashionista’s most recent newsletter and will keep coming back to check out your recipes – carbs or not.

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